Tuesday, June 23

    I didn't get much sleep at all last night. Every time I was almost asleep I would start crying. I even kept my dad up. I would cry and he would just hold me super tight until I stopped. I don't think he really cared. But then again, he does get up at five in the morning every day for work. 
    "I'm sorry. Go back to sleep, I'm resetting the alarm for seven."
    "Stop blowing your nose on the blanket Regan. Here."
    "Thank you."
    "Are you okay?"
    "Anything I can do?"
    "Want me to leave you alone?"
    "Do you think I'm pretty?"
    "I got a smile out of you. That's all I wanted."
    "I needed to smile. Thank you."
    "You're welcome. Get another hour of sleep if you can. I need to get ready for work."
    "Okay. Thank you for the booger shirt."
    "You're welcome."

    My dad was super quiet getting ready. I actually dozed off, then I heard his car start. Dang it dad! Okay! Let's try this again. Close your eyes. Better! My dad's bed is so comfortable. I did fall asleep until the alarm went off. That's good. I got maybe six hours of sleep. That's enough sleep, right? I don't feel tired at all. I just feel depressed. All the crap from last night is still very fresh. I hear my phone ringing! My dad?
    "Making sure you got up."
    "Yeah, I'm getting ready to jump in the shower."
    "I wouldn't jump in the shower."
    "You might slip and fall."
    "Shut up! I'm going now. I'll come see you when I get there."
    "Okay. Do not be late."
    "I won't. Bye."

    Let's send James a quick text before I get in the shower.

    "Good morning."
    "I'm getting in the shower right now. Do you want me to unlock the front door for you?"
    "Yeah. I'll head over as soon as my pants are dry."
    "Why are your pants wet?"
    "I was refilling Opie's water and he jumped on my and made me spill it."
    "I bet he thought it was funny."
    "He probably did. He's an asshole."
    "No, he's not."
    "Get in the shower."
    "Okay, see you soon."

    Awesome shower! I really needed that. I am also not bleeding anymore. Awesome. Bye-bye tampons. See you next month. Hello cute panties. Where are my panties? Where is my towel? Dang it! I left everything downstairs on the couch when I unlocked the door for James. Okay, maybe he isn't here yet. Run!
    "Hi there!"
    "Don't look at me!"
    "I've seen you naked already Reg. I found these folded all nice on the couch."
    "Yeah. I was getting ready to run down and grab them. Towel please?"
    "Bye-bye tampons, see you next month?"
    "You heard me!?"
    "Yeah! You didn't hear me laughing?"
    "Come here."
    "Towel first."
    "Okay, here I am."
    "Kiss, right here."
    "That's all?"
    "Mmm Hmm. Here's your clothes."
    "I thought you wanted to see it or something."
    "Not on your dad's bed I don't. But come here again."
    "Trust me."
    "Ah! Hey!"
    "I just wanted a small taste."
    "Anyway, Friday is moving day. Well, no! We are moving things all week. But I'll have my own room with a bed on Friday."
    "Then I'll play with it on Friday."
    "I don't lie when it comes to playing with my girlfriends vagina Reg."
    "You're silly. I need to finish getting ready. Are you finished looking at me?"
    "One more kiss… No. Not on your mouth. Right here."
    "I like when you kiss my belly."
    "No Opie today?"
    "Was he upset you left without him?"
    "He always gets pissed when I leave without him."
    "What time do you get off work?"
    "And you have time to drop me off here after school?"
    "Yeah. Are you sure your dad won't get mad?"
    "I'm sure he won't. You want me to ask him when we get to school?"
    "Yeah. I don't want you to get in any kind of trouble."
    "Come on you motherfucker!"
    "You okay?"
    "My fucking eyeliner pencil keeps breaking when I sharpen it. Fuck you pencil!"
    "Relax Reg."
    "Fuck you too James."
    "Hey, What's wrong?"
    "Everything! I'm sorry."
    "Here, let me sharpen it for you."
    "Thank you."
    "Is this good?"
    "A little bit more."
    "Perfect. Thank you."
    "You're welcome. Anything else I can do for you?"
    "Can you make my mom love me? Make her actually want me?"
    "No. I would if I could."
    "I left my pillow at your house last night."
    "I know. I snuggled with it. Smells like you."
    "I snuggled my dad."
    "Did you?"
    "Yeah. I drooled on him too."
    "My makeup look okay?"
    "You look beautiful."
    "Now my hair. I don't really feel like doing it."
    "I like it down. Like how you had it yesterday."
    "Oh! That's easy. Part here, razzle a bit. Done. Yeah?"
    "Very pretty. You ready? I want to stop and get breakfast."
    "Yeah. My bag is downstairs."
    "All right, let's get."
    "Thanks for being here for me and I'm sorry if I'm a bit moody today and I snap at you. Wounds from last night are still fresh."
    "You'll be fine. If you ever need anything I'm a text away."
    "And six houses down."
    "And across the street."
    "Yeah! I love you. You treat me so good. No one has treated me this good before. Makes me happy and it makes me feel really good. You smile at me and it literally makes my day better. I like it."
    "You… Just told me you love me."
    "Yeah. Is that bad?"
    "No. Just a little bit soon is all."
    "You don't have to say it back James. It won't hurt my feelings."
    "Give me a hug… I love you too Reg. Come on, let's go."

    Walking out to the car we see Liz's mom putting a few boxes in the back of her car. I haven't met her yet. But she's tall and pretty just like Liz.
    "Good morning you two. You must be Regan."
    "I'm Amanda, Lizzy's mom."
    "This is James."
    "I know James. He's the only one at the grocery store who can get my bank card to work. By the way, I did order a new one."
    "You don't like having to use a plastic bag?"
    "It's a bit embarrassing. Especially when you have a line of people behind you. Anyway, Regan. I just got off the phone with your dad. I let him know what's going on. My room and Lizzy's room are both empty. So, you guys can start moving things over whenever you're ready. There are a few boxes in the living room still. Those will be gone tomorrow. If you do move anything tonight, just be sure to put it in one of the rooms so things don't get mixed up okay?"
    "Here is Lizzy’s key. Can you make sure your dad gets it for me?"
    "Yeah. Does your key have flowers on it too?"
    "No. I had to make a copy for Lizzy and she chose that one. I'm sure your dad will give you the cute key hun."
    "I don't know. He might want the pretty flowers."
    "Flip a coin for it."
    "We might have to."
    "I hope you win. Okay, I'll let you two go. Nice meeting you hun."
    "You too."
    "Drive safe."
    "We will… She's tall just like Liz."
    "I know. Are you hungry at all?"
    "Yeah. Am I paying?"
    "No. I got money from my mom before I left."
    "I don't mind paying."
    "You get to buy us lunch."
    "What are you writing over there?"
    "Music. It's how I heal."
    "You're writing a song?"
    "It will be, yeah."
    "Is it going to be like the song you wrote your dad?"
    "Maybe. I don't really have it in my head the way I want it just yet."
    "You write a lot?"
    "Sometimes. It all depends on my mood really. I actually been working on something for you. Still a work in progress."
    "Can I see it?"
    "Nope. You can see it when it's finished."
    "What about that one?"
    "Nope. I don't like people seeing my work until it's done. I'm weird like that."
    "I'm the same way with my dancing sometimes."
    "So, Cole said you got teeth knocked out."
    "No. Four teeth got broken. Not knocked out."
    "You have really nice teeth."
    "I take care of them."
    "Amazing smile too."
    "Tongue too."
    "You don't even know yet Reg. I only gave you a little bit."
    "Yeah. You'll see soon."
    "Will I like it?"
    "You will love it."
    "I like the color of the old car right there."
    "He goes to school with us."
    "What's his name?"
    "Haven't met him."
    "You have English with him."
    "I do?"
    "I'm pretty sure you do. He has two piercings on his lip and his ears are stretched out."
    "Oh! Emily's boyfriend! Right?"
    "Yeah. I don't have English with him. But I've seen him with Emily. His car is pretty."
    "Mine isn't?"
    "Yours is too! It's all high tech and calls people."
    "It's just bluetooth. I call with my phone and it comes out the speakers."
    "It's still cool. Just like you."


    Stupid glasses! But these are so cool! I dropped them twice already and they didn't break or scratch, and they're anti-glare! How cool is that? It's just stupid I have to wear them. Right now I don't have to. So in the purse you go! I don't need you yet.
    "It's hard to do the right thing when the pressure is coming down like lightning… What?"
    "You do not sing good at all."
    "I told you I couldn't sing Sean… Stop laughing! I love this song."
    "I like it too. I think I want to use it for our Viennese Waltz."
    "I think it'll work for one. I can feel it."
    "Mmm hmm. Slow to fast makes a good rise and fall too."
    "You're hearing it different."
    "I'm listening to the beat."
    "Rotations on the beat?"
    "I hear that too."
    "Show me."
    "Okay, start the song over. The music between the beats. Hear it?"
    "1, 1-2-3, 1, 4-5-6"
    "Mmm hmm. Take out all the 1 counts and you have a Viennese Waltz count. Listen, 1-2-3, 2-2-3, 3-2-3, 4-2-3… What?"
    "You're amazing Sean. I wasn't hearing that. Well, I was! Kind of. Counting the beat, not the spacing in between."
    "I'm good at hearing every little thing and picking it apart. I can use just about any song for a dance. Slow it down, speed it up. Make it work one way or another."
    "You're music picky and I'm step picky."
    "You're detail picky."
    "Yeah! I really am."
    "I'm still getting used to that. I'm picky about details too. But you? Damn."
    "You love me though."
    "I do."
    "We need to start working on our dances for the Classics."
    "I'm working on our Viennese Waltz right now. It's in my head."
    "Will it be an outside the box Viennese Waltz?"
    "I been doodling around with a Paso."
    "I am dreading your Paso Liz. I won't lie. I'm dreading it so much."
    "It'll be fine."
    "I've looked at your notebook Liz. That crazy ass drag thing with the knee slide. What the fuck!?"
    "Yeah! I don't want to snap your neck."
    "You won't. The key is trust Love."
    "I trust you... Do I have to be part of this?"
    "No crying Sean."
    "Shut up."


    Early morning for me and Rye. We got couches, just like Ode wanted. No wood and they are not leather. He better like them! Washer and dryer and the stove got delivered first thing this morning. They also installed everything for me. They also scratched my floor and scuffed my paint. I'm a little bit pissed. Couches! Expected delivery time is between 1 pm and 2 pm. Rich and Lee will be here at some point to do some measuring and drop off the wood. Not sure if they are actually going to start on the garage today or not. Everyone has gone through their things and pulled out what they didn't want and boxed it up for me to sale. Me and Milly showed each other the clothes we didn't want anymore. Turns out she wanted my shit, and I wanted hers. My sister has great taste. I love how we actually wear the same size too! Now, yard sale time.
    "How is the baby making going?"
    "On hold for now. I started my period today."
    "I do not miss my periods."
    "You still have that little thing in your arm?"
    "Yes. And it will stay there until I'm ready to have a baby."
    "Be married first."
    "That's the plan. I don't think Scott wants to get married though."
    "He wants kids though."
    "I know. If he wants kids with me he has to marry me."
    "Have you told him that?"
    "No. The baby and marriage thing hasn't really come up. We mostly been talking about you and Oden. We are both excited."
    "Everyone is excited. Milly is super giddy about it. Throwing baby names at me already."
    "What names?"
    "Bailey for a girl and Tristan for a boy."
    "I like Bailey."
    "Knowing Oden he'll want the boy named after either him or his dad."
    "His dad… We should put a for sale sign on your car so more people stop."
    "No. Put one on your car or your sisters."
    "Our cars aren't cool like yours. We can have Rich and Lee bring Scott's Impala."
    "He sold it yesterday."
    "Damn. Just put one on your car and make the price super outrageous."
    "What if someone actually has the outrageous amount?"
    "Tell them it's sold already."


    I love and hate slow mornings. I like to keep myself busy because I tend to do stupid shit when I get bored. I have my dad taking the 429 back to the farm to sell for me. It's loaded up on the trailer and ready to go. Maybe he can a serious buyer with cash. Everyone here who is interested in it wants to make payments. Or pay me half now half later. They get all pissed off when I tell them, yeah, we can do that. But you ain't gettin' the keys until it's paid off. No way in hell am I gonna let someone pay me half the asking price and take the car. Just not happening.
    "That car ready boy?"
    "Yeah. Already on the trailer around back. Where's Rich?"
    "Firehouse. Oden had to tell him everything Hayden wants."
    "Better him than her. She's beautiful in all but picky as all hell."
    "She does this shit for a living and she wants me and Rich to do it for her."
    "Yep. So, you got somethin' for me?"
    "Yeah. Your mom said to call her and let her know what happens. And you need to bring her by for dinner."
    "Thank you. Rye has been sayin' she wants to go out there and see you guys but I told her to wait and let Anna get 100% settled in and all that."
    "Anna met someone."
    "Yeah. Your mom took her to the hospital to get Oden's work looked over and the doctor she saw likes her. Asked her out to dinner and even offered her a job."
    "No shit? She takin' the job and shit?"
    "She's still thinking it over."
    "She should really do it. She loved her job here before Ryan made her quit."
    "Yeah. It'll be a good way to get back on her feet. She doesn't want to live off Hayden forever."
    "Hayden doesn't care givin' her money."
    "I know."
    "How's everything goin' out there?"
    "Oden and Hayden gave your mom baby fever."
    "You want another kid?"
    "I didn't even want you."
    "Fuck you."
    "We wanted one kid, and we had one kid. Now she's wanting another one."
    "But you don't want one?"
    "I'm still thinking it over. You and Rye having a kid anytime soon?"
    "I don't know. We haven't even talked about it."
    "Hickey on your neck there says she may want one soon."
    "No it don't. It says she likes to bite and I like it so I let her."
    "Mmm hmm."
    "I'd fuck you up if you weren't my dad."
    "I'm sure you would Scott. Don't forget where you got that mean in ya from."
    "Yeah. Did you get that old truck runnin' for Anna?"
    "Yeah. Just needed a good tune up and cleaning. She still runs like a champ."
    "Most of them old cars do."
    "Yep. I'm getting out of here. I need to go back and get Rich and get this shit done."
    "All right."
    "We'll come back by on the way out of town and pick up that car."
    "Here's the keys. Don't sell it to anyone who wants to pay half now half later."
    "Hey, if they want to pay half now half later that's fine by me. But they won't get the keys until It's paid in full."
    "If someone is okay with that then sell it to em."
    "All right. Call your mom later boy."
    "I will. The fuck outta my shop."
    "Just because you're grown doesn't mean I won't whoop your ass Scott."
    "Do somethin' old man."
    "I don't want your mom pissed off at me for making her little boy cry."
    "The fuck outta here."
    "You know it's true!"
    "Yeah! See ya!"


    I haven't been able to focus all day. The good thing, I was able to hold back the urge to yell at a teacher for telling to put my notebook away and pay attention. I still feel bad for snapping at James this morning. He understands I'm just hurting right now. And he's here for me. I love that.
    "You're not going to eat Reg?"
    "Huh? I have been eating."
    "You ate like three fries and a small bite of your burger."
    "That's still eating."
    "Come on, put your notebook away and have a conversation with me. Please?"
    "Okay okay."
    "You're still all broke. I don't seeing you like this."
    "I'm sorry. I'm working on it. When this is done, I'll feel much better. Can I use your laptop today?"
    "Is that program hard to use?"
    "Not really. If you go to the help tab on the top, you can watch a tutorial video. It's pretty easy to use."
    "Okay. So, besides getting hit in the nose is it fun working with Liz?"
    "It's kind of hard actually. She makes me do everything the right way. The right way is way harder than it looks."
    "Can I see the video of her and Sean again?"
    "It's so pretty. She did a really good job."
    "Yeah. It'll be hard to learn though. She’s picky and everything has to be perfect, and I don't move like her."
    "A whole new language huh?"
    "Pretty much. I'm used to moving my way and I have to learn her way. Like changing everything I know. It sucks."
    "You're an amazing dancer too. You'll get it."
    "I'm a good hip hop dancer. Not ballroom. But yeah, I'll get it."
    "Ain't no sunshine when she's gone."
    "It's not warm when she's away."
    "Ain't no sunshine when she's gone."
    "And she's always gone too long anytime she goes away."
    "That was cool. I'm surprised you know that song."
    "I listen to all kinds of music Reg. Don't you?"
    "Not really. You're opening that up for me though. You're always playing something good in your car. I like the one song we heard this morning."
    "That tells me nothing. We heard a lot of songs this morning."
    "Life is not easy, I'm not made out of stone?"
    "I'm not made out of steel. I'll Show You by Justin Bieber."
    "Ew! I like a Justin Bieber song?"
    "He has some good songs."
    "Prove it! Play one you have on your phone."
    "Slow or fast?"
    "One that reminds you of me."
    "Okay. This one is called Purpose."
    "I hate it."
    "Why are you playing an invisible piano on the table then?"
    "Shut up."
    "Regan likes the Biebs."
    "I'm not a Beib lover!"
    "The invisible piano says different."
    "You're mean."
    "I did make you smile though."
    "I know. Thanks."

    I really do need all the smiles I can get. James does an awesome job at making me laugh and smile. Even though he was giving me a hard time because I happen to like a Justin Bieber song. I was still all smiles. Man! Cole is sitting next to Liz.
    "Hey guys."
    "Move so Purple Head can sit next to me."
    "All right."
    "Thank you Cole."
    "You and Flinch have a good lunch?"
    "Yeah. He was giving me a hard time because I like a Justin Bieber song."
    "What's wrong with him? The Biebs is the shit. I love him."
    "I don't really like pop music and James listens to so much different kinds of music and I happen to like two Justin Bieber songs and he was like, Bieber lover."
    "Cole… Regan likes Justin Bieber."
    "All the girls do."
    "I like two songs!"
    "Listen to the song called Sorry and then you'll like three!"
    "Is it too late to say sorry? I know I let you down, is it too late to say sorry now? Oh oo oo."
    "Damn Cole! Where did that come from?"
    "You sing too?"
    "I'm in the music program."
    "No. The music program is for kids who sing and play instruments like the guitar or the bass. Band is just trumpets and shit."
    "You're really good. You should do a song with me sometime."
    "You sing?"
    "Yeah. I play guitar, piano, I write and I sing."
    "Done! Here you guys go."
    "Thanks. Let me hear you sing."
    "I got a video on my phone. It's the most recent song I wrote. Here."
    "You look way hotter with black hair."
    "Lemme see! You look just like your dad."
    "Yeah. Everyone says that. I got my mom's nose though."
    "Black is your natural hair color?"
    "What are you and your dad? Nationality?"
    "Oh. Press play now… Did you write this piano mu… Holy shit."
    "Right?! Dang Purple Head."
    "Thanks. And yes, I did write the music too. I compose and arrange all my music. All me."
    "Look at my arms."
    "Mine too. Goose pimples. You're so good. Odd voice."
    "What Liz means is odd is good."
    "Yeah! People like things that are different. You're awesome and different for sure. In a good way."
    "I'll defiantly do a song with you. Do one with me first. I write too and for extra credit every week we can record what we wrote. The people who just make music work with the writers and all that."
    "Can I see the song?"
    "Yeah, It's in my locker though. Um, I can email it to you after school when I get home."
    "Okay. Here's my email."
    "I might lose that paper. Text me your email. 559-7326."
    "Oh… Sent."
    "Can you send me this video too?"
    "Me too?"
    "Yeah… It says the file is too big."
    "Here I don't know how to do that."
    "Me either I don't have an iPhone. Cole you have an iPhone. Bluetooth for her."
    "Okay. Turn your Bluetooth on Liz."
    "It's on. Password?"
    "Send file, Which one is it Reg?"
    "Um… The second one."
    "James showed me the Waltz you made."
    "What do you think?"
    "It's very pretty. James said it's going to be hard to learn because you're picky."
    "I'm very picky. But the Waltz isn't hard at all. He just needs to get down the Ballroom frame and what not and it'll be super easy after that."
    "Yeah, he said he moves way different so It's going to be hard."
    "He'll get it. I won't be too hard on him I promise. Files done."
    "Yup, here's your work back. Finish the homework?"
    "Yeah. Regan has it already."
    "Don't be mean to my boyfriend please."
    "I won't be. Maybe."


    The Purple Head sings so effing good! I was expecting this little voice because she's so young. Oh no! It totally blew me away. She's seriously right up there with Melissa. Wee!
    "Hi My Love!"
    "You need to drop me off at the potty so I can change my shirt."
    "Okay. I don't feel good."
    "Aw! What's wrong?"
    "I don't know. I started feeling sick in class."
    "I bet it was that Zesty sauce you had with your chicken strips. I told you it tasted funny."
    "I'm starting to think you're right. I need to put you down. I'm sorry."
    "You don't look good at all Sean. Go to the bathroom and puke."
    "I hate puking. I'm actually holding it back right now."
    "You'll feel better if you puke Love."
    "No I won't. When I puke it comes out my nose and I end up with a sinus infection."
    "Don't puke with your head facing down. Just tilt it a little bit and it won't come out your nose."
    "Yeah. I used to get those infections from puking too and my mom told me not to look down and puke."
    "I might get it on me."
    "So. You got an extra shirt in the truck."
    "Go puke Love. I'll meet you in class."
    "I'm going outside for a minute. Maybe the fresh air will help."
    "Okay. I'll let Ms. Cooper where you are and all that."

    Poor Sean! I told him when I tasted the sauce that it tasted funky and he said it tasted just fine to him. I eat a lot! I know when something is funky. He'll be fine once he pukes. Hey! Flinch is actually working on his frame. Nice!
    "Elbow up and even with your shoulder. Not down here."
    "Oh. Like this?"
    "Yup. Looking good! Did you work on it last night?"
    "I did a little bit."
    "Awesome. Okay! We got the video me and Sean did. What do you wanna work on first?"
    "Doesn't matter to me."
    "Okay, how about we just go from the beginning?"
    "All right. No Sean today?"
    "He's outside getting some air. His lunch made him sick and he doesn't feel good."
    "Where did you guys go?"
    "Johnny's. I told him his dipping sauce tasted funny, and he said it was fine."
    "The Zesty?"
    "My dad got sick from that a few days ago."
    "Did he really?"
    "Yeah. He was puking all night."
    "Aw! Sean said he was holding back puke."
    "He just needs to let go and puke it up."
    "He said he doesn't like to puke because it comes out his nose."
    "I hate that shit. It happens to me too."
    "Don't look down when you puke, just tilt your head a little bit."
    "I do stare into the toilet when I puke."
    "Don't do that. Also! Stop dropping your elbow."
    "Let's do this. Elbow up. I'm going to try to push it down, but don't let me."
    "…Ah! Flinch!"
    "Oh shit!"
    "I guess that's pay back for me hitting you in the nose. Ow!"
    "I didn't think you were going to let go of my elbow like that."
    "My hand slipped off."
    "At least you're not bleeding."
    "Right. Keep your elbow up. Moving on!"
    "Wear the dance wound."
    "Shut up."


    I finished writing, and I been working on this music since I been home. Only piano, nothing fancy. I think I got it just the way I want it. The arrangement works perfectly as well. My dad is going to get mad at me because I didn't do my homework. Maybe he'll understand why I didn't do it when I got home and not ground me. I just want this all done before I forget it.
    "Your loud car messed up my recording dad."
    "I'm sorry."
    "It didn't! You're not in trouble."
    "I hope you did your homework before you started playing around."
    "I didn't."
    "Did you even start on it?"
    "You know the rules Regan."
    "My phone is right there on the table. Take it."
    "What's the problem Regan?"
    "Nothing. I just had to get this done before it went away."
    "You do your homework first. That's the rules."
    "I'm almost done."
    "Homework now. Come on."
    "I'm almost done!"
    "Now Regan!"
    "No! Just let me finish this. All I have to do is save and export it. That's all."
    "How long?"
    "Um… It says one hour. But James said it never takes that long."
    "Can you just start it and do your homework?"
    "Start it and then do your homework. When you're done you can call Mr. Larson and let him know you won't have a phone and you won't be needing a ride to and from school for the rest of the week."
    "The principle had a chat with me today about you."
    "Am I in trouble for something?"
    "Your hair color is against the dress code."
    "There's a girl at school who has the sides of her head shaved and I have to dye my hair. Not fair."
    "Ms. Walker can put her hair down and it's not noticeable. Your hair is always noticeable. I did tell you if he said anything to me that there was nothing I could do."
    "I know."
    "He knows we're moving so he's giving me two weeks to take you to get it done. Kind of. Not this Monday, but next Monday he expects you to be at school with a normal hair color."
    "Fair enough. What color should I go with?"
    "Why not your natural color?"
    "I want something cute. Not just plain black. Can I get highlights with the black?"
    "As long as it's not some crazy color you'll be fine."
    "What about like a dark red with black highlights?"
    "James likes the dark red."
    "We'll see. It all depends how you do this week on maid duty."
    "All right. Here's my math homework if you want to check it."
    "You just told me you didn't do any of your homework."
    "I did my math in class. Liz helped me."
    "Helped or you copied?"
    "Redo it."
    "Hey! Why did you rip up my homework?"
    "You do not learn when you copy. Redo it."
    "Dang it dad!"

(Click the computer for some Sims goodies!)

    That was completely uncalled for! I should've waited and showed him my math with everything else. So it's my fault really. But math is stupid. Seriously! How often do you use math?
    "How are you doing over there?"
    "Everything is finished but math. It's stupid. How often do you use math at work?"
    "Every day."
    "Can you turn the chair and tell me if my song is still saving please?"
    "It says two minutes remaining."
    "You want to hear it when it's done?"
    "I'll hear it when you're finished with your math."
    "My phone!"
    "Give it here."
    "It's James."
    "You can call him back when you're done."
    "Fucking stupid!"
    "Excuse me?"
    "Nothing. Here's my phone."
    "Obviously I made your bad mood worse."
    "Can you tell?"
    "Loud and clear."
    "How can someone hurt me so much without doing any physical harm?"
    "When someone is strong enough to push you down, you show them you're strong enough to stand back up. Everything heals Regan. Sooner or later this situation won't hurt you at all. It's building you into a stronger you. How you come out of this situation will define what kind of person you can be. Understand?"
    "Yes. I'm done now."
    "Bring it here."
    "Here you go. Oh! My file is done. Now we go to file and export. Is my math okay?"
    "Pretty good. These six are wrong."
    "Look, you multiply and divide before you add or subtract. Okay?"
    "This equation here, 46+32x6+3 is not 471."
    "I just added it up and got that."
    "I know. You have to rewrite it like this… 46+(32x6)+3. Okay?"
    "32x6 first."
    "Show your work and figure it out."
    "Correct. 46+3?"
    "There you go."
    "The answer is 241?"
    "Yes. You multiply or divide before you add or subtract."
    "That's actually really simple. I don't know why I didn't know I had to do that stuff first. I thought you just add it all up."
    "Nope. Math isn't that difficult. You just need to find your own way to do it so it's easy for you."
    "I need a math brain like Liz. She even shows work when she doesn't even have to think about the equation. It's so weird."
    "Here's your phone. Go call your boyfriend. You got ten minutes."
    "Then we listen to my song?"
    "Oh! Um… I have an email I need to print out. Is there a way to print from my phone?"
    "No. You can use the computer when I'm done to print it."
    "Okay. Can I go sit outside and call James?"
    "Yes. Ten minutes start now."
    "Thank you."

    Cole is a pretty decent writer. No idea how I'll be able to work with him this week since I'm grounded. Maybe my dad will let him come over when he's home to work on it. I doubt it. I broke the rules and I have to face my punishment. But it still won't hurt to ask him.

    "Hi there!"
    "Hey, what's up?"
    "Nothing. I just got out of the shower and I am getting ready to start on my homework."
    "I'm grounded. I only have ten minutes to talk to you. After this, I won't have my phone for the rest of the week and you can't give me a ride to and from school."
    "What did you do?"
    "I didn't do my homework before my dad got home."
    "Couldn't put the notebook away huh?"
    "No. I wanted to finish it and I did. I saved it to the Regan folder you made for me. You can listen to it tomorrow when I give you your laptop back."
    "You can still use it if you want. I don't need it back right away. I got my other laptop. I only use that one to do music."
    "Okay. I'll see if I'm allowed to hold on to it. If not, I'll bring it for you tomorrow."
    "Sounds good. Email your song so I can listen to it."
    "I don't have your email address. Send me an email so I have it."
    "Okay… Hold on a second, opening my email. Okay, what's your email address?"
    "Regan oh!"
    "Regan Olivia."
    "I like that name. Olivia."
    "My grandma's name. So! Did you know Cole could sing?"
    "Yeah. I've done a couple songs with him and one with him and Gianni."
    "Gianni sings?"
    "Yeah. Wait… You met Gianni?"
    "No. Cole told me and Liz that Sean beat him up."
    "Cole wants me to do a song with him."
    "Yeah. Are you okay with that?"
    "Yeah. I'm not okay with Gianni."
    "What does he have to do with me and Cole?"
    "He's Cole's go-to guy when he wants someone else to sing the chorus in his stuff. So he might be working with you guys too."
    "Okay. What's your issue with him?"
    "He's a douche canoe."
    "You know why me and Becky broke up? Have I told you that yet?"
    "No. But Cole said you dumped her when she broke your teeth trying to break up a fight with her and Lee Lee."
    "Lee Lee is Hailey and that's only part of it. Hailey saw her and Gianni out hanging all over each other and making out and shit while I was at work. She took a picture of them and texted it to me. The next day at school is when I showed Becky the picture and asked her, what the fuck. That's how that fight started. But I was done with her as soon as I got the picture. Her breaking my teeth just permanently sealed the deal. You don't fuck around with some guy’s girlfriend. You just don't do it. That's why I don't like him."
    "She cheated on you?"
    "I don't know. I don't care if she did or not."
    "Gianni will hit on you, and I'm not okay with that."
    "If he does I'll tell him to leave me alone because I have a boyfriend."
    "He won't care. He didn't care about Becky having one."
    "Okay, how about this… If Cole wants him to work on this to… We'll have him track his part separate. That way I won't even be there."
    "I'm okay with that."
    "I knew you would be. I have to go. My dad is looking at me and tapping his wrist."
    "All right. I'll see you tomorrow."
    "Yep. Night James."
    "Night Regan… Hey!"
    "I love you."
    "I love you too James."

    James said he loves me. That made me feel so good. It gave me butterflies.

    "Here's my phone. Sorry I went over my ten minutes."
    "You're fine."
    "Ready to hear my song?"
    "Let me finish this first."
    "You work too much."
    "This is custody stuff Regan."
    "Oh! You're talking to Grandma?"
    "Tell her I said hi. Are you hungry?"
    "No. I'm fine."
    "Okay. Did you have a good day?"
    "It was okay."
    "You don't converse very much do you dad?"
    "I'm just busy right now Regan."
    "Okay, sorry. I'll leave you alone."
    "Five minutes is all I need."
    "All right. I'll just sit here and eat my cereal. You finish your chat with Grandma. Who's calling me?"
    "I see you're making new friends."
    "I have math with him. But speaking of Cole. He wants me to do a song with him for his assignment for the week."
    "James said I can use his laptop as long as I need to. So, can Cole come over here and work on it with me? While you're home."
    "I guess that's fine. What kind of assignment is it?"
    "He's in the music program at school and the students get extra credit for recording their songs and what not. I showed him and Liz the video on my phone. The song I wrote you and he was blown away and he wants me to help him with his assignment."
    "I see. Yeah, that'll be fine. But will have to be when we get home."
    "I'm staying after school with you? Not taking the bus?"
    "That is correct."
    "And I have to go to school with you?"
    "Also correct."
    "Dang dad. Meany."
    "I told you I can take away freedom points as well. Now come over here and let me hear this song."
    "One second. Washing my bowl. Did you tell Grandma I said hi?"
    "Yes ma'am."
    "I'm not wearing headphones with cat ears. Just press play."
    "Here's my notebook with the lyrics."
    "This notebook is nearly full."
    "I do need a new one. Grandma bought me this one for my birthday. I love it. I wish I knew where she got it so I could buy a few more."
    "I'll ask her and have her mail them out if you want."
    "Could you please!?"
    "I will."
    "Thank you! Anyway! Last song in the notebook. Under Your Thumb. Ready?"
    "Hold on, hold on. Let me finish reading this."
    "Pretty hateful lines in here."
    "It's what mom made me feel. Ready to hear it?"
    "Oh, the sound sucks on the laptop. Hold on. Um… YES! T.V has an auxiliary port. My song on surround sound. And play!"
    "You did all this yourself? Came up with the music too?"
    "I did. All me. It came out good. This is my first time hearing it. I didn't listen to it before I saved it. You like it?"
    "I do like it. I like it very much. This is how you heal?"
    "Yeah. Most of the time. Better than doing drugs or drinking right?"
    "Much better than drugs or drinking. You should send this to your grandma when you print that email you asked about."
    "That's right. Cole emailed me his song and I want to print it. James wants me to send him the song too."
    "Here you go. I'm going up to shower and get ready for bed."
    "Save me some hot water I want to shower before bed too."

    Song is sent to my Grandma and James. Now! This song Cole wrote is so good. I'll keep saying it! It's so good! He even marked the part he wants me to do and said to do the music anyway I want. But I don't know how he sings, like is he rock, pop, a rapper? So it's kind of hard to even think of music. I can do anything really. So it would be so much easier if it was my song. I just need to know his strength. My dad just got in the shower. I can hear the water when it turns on and off. He did leave my phone here. I need to call Cole.
    "Hey, sorry I missed your call earlier. I was doing my homework."
    "It's cool. I was just calling to see if you got my email."
    "I did. Um… I have no idea how to do that music for this."
    "Do it however you want."
    "I can't do that. I need to hear something you've done already so I can have some kind of idea."
    "Oh okay."
    "I just need to know what kind of singer you are. You know?"
    "What genre?"
    "Yeah. I can do just about anything but most people stick to one type."
    "I only have two things on my computer. Everything else I've done Sean has on his computer and Flinch has a couple too. I can send you these two and if you still want something else I'll talk to them and get the files for you."
    "I have James' computer."
    "Do you?"
    "Look on the desktop. Do you see a folder named Eller?"
    "That's my folder with the hip hop stuff I did with him."
    "Only three?"
    "Yeah. I'm sending these two I have."
    "Okay. You want to come over to my house to work on this?"
    "I can if that works better for you. But I won't be able to show until around six. I have football after school."
    "That's fine. I'm actually grounded and I have to stay with my dad after school and we won't be here until about five."
    "Works out perfect then."
    "Yeah. You know where I live?"
    "I live on the same street as James. Next door to Liz."
    "Oh! Okay. Blaine is your neighbor too."
    "Yup. He lives in the two-story house next to you guys."
    "I didn't know that. That's cool."
    "Okay, I have to go. Don't forget to send me those files."
    "Already did. Check your email."
    "Oh! There they are. Thank you."
    "You're welcome."
    "See you tomorrow. Night."

    I almost got caught on the phone. I take that back. I did get caught. My dad checked my phone when he came down to get it. He asked why I was on the phone and I was honest. I needed to ask Cole for songs. So, I'm off the hook for using the phone. My dad likes the honesty thing and I'm kissing major ass so he's not so hard on me this week. He took my phone and his computer with him when he went to bed. He didn't take James' computer though. I don't know why. Maybe he forgot about it or maybe he just didn't want to mess with it because it doesn't belong to him. Since I got the laptop let's go ahead and download these two songs Cole sent. I got an email back from my Grandma. She loves my song. She loves everything I do. No response from James. Back to Cole's music. The two songs he sent me are acoustic songs. Just him and a guitar. Very raw and I do love raw music. Gives you the chance to really hear the singers voice. Cole has a very good voice. Then there's the three on James' laptop. James isn't singing in them, he did the hip hop beats. Which are very good too. All the songs with Cole are really good. I think the direction I'm going to go with this music is like the two songs he sent me. Little more raw sounding. I wonder if he would get mad if I changed something in his song. I got this! Let's send him an email and see. It's only ten. He might still be awake.
    "Can I change the lyrics in the chorus? Just add something to it as an underlay to make it pop more?"
    "I got an idea for the music but I want to see if you're okay with it. I messed around a little bit before my dad went to bed. I just recorded the first verse and chorus. I like the two files you sent me, how they are acoustic and super raw. So I went that direction."
    "Send it."
    "I am. It's still attaching to the email."
    "You didn't convert to MP3 huh?"
    "Was I suppose to?"
    "No. If you left it lossless it'll take a minute is all."
    "James said to leave everything lossless."
    "It's fine. But if you want to email it after it's better to convert it to MP3 so it doesn't take as long to send. Do you have Facebook?"
    "Search for me with my email address and add me. It's easier to talk on the messenger."
    "Friend request sent."
    "Talk to me on there, I added you."
    "Yup. You're hot in your profile picture."
    "Um… Thanks."
    "I'm not hitting on you. I'm only saying. You should add Liz and them."
    "Are you friends with them?"
    "Yup. Look through my friends list."
    "Okay. How did Blaine get the scar on his face?"
    "Oh... Fighting?"
    "Something like that. Jacob cut him with his pocket knife because he called Melissa a whore."
    "You're blowing up my notifications liking all of my pictures."
    "So. Now you're blowing mine up?"
    "Yup! Liz accepted my request. Cool. So did Sean and Hailey."
    "Liz has good pictures."
    "There's tons of her and Sean."
    "How long have they been a couple?"
    "Like two weeks or something."
    "Really? They seem like they been a couple for a long time."
    "They get along really good."
    "That email sent."
    "Okay. Hold on and let me check it."
    "All right."
    "That's my bass line."
    "Yeah. James showed me his folder of music and said I could use whatever I wanted. The one said, simple bass - Eller."
    "I made that a while ago and could never really fit it with anything. Pretty cool you got it to work with this song."
    "You like it? The arrangement and everything?"
    "Yeah. I like it a lot actually. Your voice is killer in the chorus."
    "Even Lee Lee is blown away. I showed her the video on my phone and she was blown away then. But she said she likes this one way better."
    "Tell her thanks."
    "She said you're way too young to have such a mean voice."
    "Mean voice?"
    "Good voice."
    "Have you listened to anything in Melissa's folder?"
    "Go in her folder and listen to the song called Next Level."
    "Featuring Eller?"
    "With music you just go by Eller?"
    "She's so good. Her voice is amazing."
    "Yup. She's very good. She doesn't really like to sing though. She mostly writes. She sings her own songs to see the finished product. But she rather have other people sing her songs. She literally has thousands of notebooks filled with songs."
    "Is she in the music program?"
    "She was last year. I think she tried to sign up this year too, but the class was full."
    "That sucks."
    "Listen to the song she did with Flinch. It's called, Love Me or something. He's actually singing in it."
    "Make Love to Me featuring Flinch."
    "James can rap pretty fast."
    "He's a dope ass beatboxer too."
    "Yeah. Keep listening to the song. Wait for it."
    "That's a cool distortion he used on his voice."
    "That's not a distortion. That's all him."
    "No way!"
    "That's super cool sounding."
    "Right? Hey, I have to take Lee Lee home. I'll see you tomorrow."
    "Okay. Night."

    Super cool that Cole likes the idea I came up with for the music. Also cool he's letting me arrange the whole thing too. I also got some new friends on Facebook. Cool! Now! Bedtime. I have to get up all super early to go to school with my dad. So stupid! But it's okay. I finished my song and I do feel much better now. I wish I had my phone to text James goodnight. Wait! The house phone! I have his number in my bag still. Yes!
    "Did I wake you?"
    "Who is this?"
    "Oh. Didn't recognize your voice because you're whispering. Are you okay?"
    "Yeah. I just wanted to call and tell you goodnight."
    "That's all?"
    "Yeah. So, goodnight, sleep tight, don't let the Opie bite."
    "Don't let the Opie bite. Night Reg."
    "Love you."
    "I love you too Regan. Like for real love you. I shouldn't have said that last part."
    "What last part?"
    "I love you for real too. I shouldn't have said that."
    "Said what?"
    "Nice. Okay, I need to get off here. Goodnight for real James."
    "Night. Love you."
    "Love you too."

    Now! I feel better!